In a world ever more catered to people with a total lack of common sense, Facebook have announced that they have completely removed all fake news from the social media site.
In what is being described as another major victory for dummies, village idiots, town dopes and Donald Trump supporters all over the world have been celebrating the news.
“It’s about time they got rid of all that fake nonsense,” claimed Trump campaigner, and owner of the world’s ugliest soul, Katie Hopkins. “These fake news sites have been popping up all over the place and fooling people into thinking their hilariously ironic and sarcastic headlines are real. Who wouldn’t believe that a man farted himself inside out or that Barack Obama wasn’t an alien? You can’t trust anything these days.”
Florida native Maurice Dawson, described as a gormless idiot, claims that he is delighted Facebook has finally made the move to ban fake news from appearing in his newsfeed.
“I don’t know about you people, living in your fancy houses, in towns, but I want to believe everything I read on the internet,” explained Dawson. “It’s just easier that way, there’s no way I’m going to go and research everything I read, not that I read a lot, I tend to get most of my information from videos and TV, it would take way too long.”
“I want the information I’m given to come straight from major TV networks and state controlled news agencies,” continued Maurice, known locally as Mo the Moron. “At least that way you know it’s real and you can form an informed and educated opinion on things. Fake news is the worst thing to happen to the world since Nazi propaganda, now shut the fuck up, The Sean Hannity Show is about to start.”
According to sources, Facebook are set to reinvest the money that would have been paid to fake news sources as ad revenue, into a project called “Operation Feed the Masses”, which isn’t a program setup to alleviate world hunger but instead an attempt to spoon feed Mark Zuckerberg’s piss to the world’s many idiots, under the promise it will make their breath smell minty fresh.
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